Alright...Confession time!! I have dealt with anxiety all of my life. It was only this past year I realized what I was dealing with (thanks to my wonderful boyfriend). I always thought something was off with me. I was never comfortable in my own skin. I never wanted to participate in any games when I was younger, I absolutely hated school and any social get togethers, and I could not deal with stress at all. Any stress at all put me over the edge mentally and emotionally. I'm definitely an introvert and like to keep to myself.
There are a few situations that stick out in my head that made me realize I had a problem. One was when I was 17 years old. I was in high school and playing high school volleyball at the time. Volleyball seemed to get my mind off everything that was going on in my life. Exercise always seemed the answer to my anxiety. At this time, my life was hectic. School, volleyball practice and games, and working out on top of that. In the midst of all this my mom informed me that she wanted to divorce my father (which never happened), but I took it to heart. I became physically ill and my immune system became weak. I got mono, an extremely bad sinus infection, and a severe UTI. This is one way my body handled all the anxiety and stress.
Another situation that I recall is when I was 18 and had my first job. It wasn't a bad job, I just didn't like the social interaction. I would pretend to be sick and call off or be late on purpose. I was too anxious to work with the public. At this time I turned to exercise again and took up running. I did end up getting fired from that job (oops), but it was for the best.
Before this year, the only time I would feel at peace with my life is when I was working out, running, or doing some sort of physical activity. When I became a beachbody coach last year, I actually became confident in myself. I actually did not feel anxious at all. I'm not sure if it was from all the endorphins or all the excitement, but I felt like I was supposed to be doing this. I felt like this was the answer to my problems.
I then decided I was going to move out of my parent's house (finally) and move in with my boyfriend and daughter. Talk about extreme stress!! I wasn't used to living on my own. I wasn't used to paying bills. My beachbody business took a back burner and I fell back into my anxious ways. It was worse than ever and my boyfriend suggested I talked to a doctor. I did at that point and she put me on medication. Here I am again taking my beachbody business serious and I'm hoping I can wean myself off the meds. I want to be healthy, all natural, and care free. This is a big goal of mine!
I know not everyone is perfect. I know not all beachbody coaches are perfect. We are all human and can make mistakes. I'm just trying to get back on track and love my life!!
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